Prompt 10 – Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out? Prompt 13 – Action. When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?

In January I went back to grad school for my Master’s in Library Science at UB. I’ve been a part-time student and after two semesters, I’ve got four courses completed (and a lot more to go). It’s been great to be a student again, and I’ve enjoyed most of my classes.  I consider my choice to go back to school a wise one, and a definitive step in a new direction, an action.

I feel the same way about my decision to take a leave of absence next semester.

I’ve been meaning to write about it for a month or so but have needed time to gather my thoughts and decide how much I want to share. The most basic and fundamental reason for taking a leave of absence is that I need some time to think about whether or not this program is right for me, both in the long-term as a career path and right now in my current professional/personal life. What’s more, I’ve got these very loud dreams related to my writing and photography banging at my door–I want to let them in and see what’s up.

I don’t want to waste time though. I don’t want to take a leave from school and come out of it without any answers. I want to be productive and realistic. I’m scared of the judgment that may come with my decision. I’m worried people will think of me as a flake or a naive dreamer. There are parts of me that think that way sometimes. I’m trying my best to focus on what feels right and I know, instinctively, that this decision is.

To ease some of the above concerns, I’ve decided that during my leave of absence I will create and follow a syllabus of my own making. I’m going to give myself assignments, readings, field trips, and objectives related to my MLS program, photography dreams, and writing. I’m going to take seriously this opportunity to figure things out because I do not want to spend another semester being unsure or another year in which I ignore my gut. The syllabus is in the works, and I’m giving myself until mid-January to complete it. When I’m done with the syllabus, I’ll post it here.

I’m deep into the final round of work for my Fall 2010 semester. I probably won’t get my head above water until this weekend, and that’s going to require some disciplined, focused work on my day off Thursday as well as Saturday and Sunday.

In my absence, I encourage you all to read my friend Lisa’s really inspiring blog post about her decision to create a life more in tune with her values and priorities. It’s very powerful and brave, and I wish I could meet her for coffee and conversation. I’ve been asking myself a lot of the same questions Lisa asked herself, and I have a somewhat related announcement coming in the next couple weeks.

For now, visit Lisa’s blog and sigh with me over that Blue Mountain Lake sunset.

Still, I’m thinking a lot about the transition and find myself considering all my options, not just those related to my Master’s degree. Maybe this is silly or even irresponsible but I am. I want to be a librarian but I also want to be many other things: self-employed, a full-time writer, a professional photographer, a freelancer.

Trying to decide when, how, and if I will do any or all of the above is tough. The last time I was free to follow my gut, to let the butterflies in my stomach be a compass and not a deterrent, was around the time I decided to buy a house in Buffalo and started the first political job that has led me to my current position. There were people, including, at times, me, who doubted my decisions on both fronts. I pushed past them and have been rewarded with a great community, loving partner, and a sincere sense of accomplishment. I’m trying to remember that I have trusted my gut before, and that it was difficult and rewarding.

This tweet, from Jesh de Rox, gets at it: “the part of you that feels moved/thrilled/inspired is a compass. it follows invisible lines of energy that far pre-date roads or maps.”

The questions I’ve been asking myself relate to the first step. When do you take the first, hardest step that feels more like jumping off a plank? Am I going to have the guts to do it? Are there good reasons it feels so different at 27 than it did at 23? To help me answer these questions I signed up for the fall Dream Lab over at Mondo Beyondo. I’m excited to explore all the themes but especially courage, especially “fear as a path.”

I spent the past week or so focusing on the house work I abandoned during the last weeks of school, both in terms of my own domestic situation and the needs of The Property I own. Yard work, laundry work, arranging work with contractors. Steve more or less challenged me to try to do one of the more physical projects we had on our list, and two hours later I had taken down a fence. It felt great to sweat and get scratched up and feel accomplished, even on a minor scale.

I’m reading Zeitoun and watching Treme and viewing When the Levees Broke. My mind is filled with pictures and stories from New Orleans, both my own and other people’s.

Grad school is going well, and keeping me very busy. The work hasn’t been too difficult, just time-consuming. I’m really enjoying my Introduction to Library Studies class, and becoming familiar with the issues librarians deal with in the school, public, and corporate environments. I’ve also completed 25 hours of observation within school library media centers, both elementary and high school, and have felt at the end of each observation that I’ve picked the right career.

A couple of things have helped sustain me through the past two months, and I thought I’d drop them on y’all:

Friday Nights Lights. Sean started watching this show on Netflix streaming and after he, Natalie, and Brian gushed over it on our trip to Colorado, I decided to join the party. As usual, I’m years behind on this television show but it hasn’t stopped me from becoming obsessed and making things like the picture you see on your right. You know, because I have so much free time and all. Anyway, I’ve lost many hours of sleep to FNL but am happy to report that come Season 4′s premiere on NBC in April, I will be ready to watch it with the rest of the world. That’s right, I’m all caught up.

Yoga Today. My friend Anna and I have been trying to go to a yoga class at the new Shakti Yoga on Grant Street since it opened in January. We’ve yet to find a time or day that works for us so I’ve been sneaking in classes via the internet when I can. My new computer is fast and memory-free enough to download several podcasts from YogaToday.com. I highly, highly recommend you check out Yoga Today if you’re interested in adding variation to your routine or even if you’re a beginner. My favorite instructor is Neesha. She practices (and teaches) Anusara Yoga, a joyful and low-pressure style that I first learned in college at the Valley School of Dance & Shakti Yoga.